Breaker of The 4th Wall
by CybeastFalzar
Summary: A kid gets up one morning, and meets a shadowy figure in a back alley. Reading his innermost thoughts, which believe life is boring, the shadowy figure force-feeds him something, claiming that his life is about to get a whole lot more interesting. Also that this cross is his for the rest of his life. He'll never be bored again, that's for sure. Whether he comes out alive though...
1. A Back Alley Meeting

OK this is my first attempt at writing fan fiction that someone other than myself sees. So don't be surprised if this falls flat and I do a Pheonix Wright Game Over impression. Which is to say I stop writing. "But the miracle never happen..."

Credit to Ran-Rii on MOTK for the basic ideas. Which I helped develop. If you re confused, it was a What if? thread and I had asked what would happen if the fourth wall spontaneously collapsed. To which she replied with a VERY NICE STORY. It's on the "what if?" thread on page 20

Anyway, that was the inspiration for this story.

Chapter 1: A Back Alley Meeting

It was a perfectly ordinary morning. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, it was 9 AM... "WAIT. 9AM?! Oh, crud! I overslept! Gotta move, I sure hope I'm not too late!" With that, Lance jumped up, dressed at whirlwind speed and ran outside. He sure didn't want to miss his date! Little did he know... that soon his girlfriend would be the least of his problems. Nor did he know that he'd soon be meeting a girl who took the phrase "whirlwind speed " quite literally. And she'd be the first...

"Excuse me, coming through!" He said as he dashed through the streets. People jumped out of the way as he barreled through, occasionally yelling colorful language at him. He ignored it. He just had to get to that restaurant and... "HUH!?"

He'd gone the wrong way! This was a dead end! He turned around, but a shadow appeared. "Oh, crud..." he whimpered to himself. He was reflecting on his life as the shadow got closer. And closer. And closer. He stood there, as if he was frozen to the spot. And in fact, although he didn't yet know it, he WAS. His shoes had sunk an inch deep into what should have been solid road. It was solid now though, and he couldn't move them. Just as he realized this, the figure said: "My, my. You certainly don't seem happy with your life." "Get away from me!" Lance cried out, struggling to free his shoes from the road. "Is that any way to treat someone who's trying to help you?" replied the shadowy figure, with a touch of amusement in its voice. "Help me? I don't even know you!" Lance fired back.

"Oh, but i am trying to help you. You think life is boring, don't you? You wish for a bit more spice..." The figure was now right next to him, whispering in his ear. He was struck dumb. How is it that this figure, who he still had yet to get a good look at, knew so much? How did it give voice to his innermost thoughts like that? Those thoughts he practically kept sealed in an iron vault? "Now then, where were we... Oh yes. That's what. It's dangerous to go alone, you know. Take this." It pulled what looked like a test tube out of nowhere and lightning fast, it force-fed the contents to him.

*cough* *cough* "What was that? It tasted disgusting." Lance said to the figure, having strangely lost his fear. The figure started laughing. "You'll find out... believe me, it won't take long. This cross is yours to carry now... for the rest of your life. Oh, and one more thing. You need to change your definition of firing back... huhuhuhu..." The shadowy figure disappeared.

"Well, that was weird. That didn't seem to be poison or anything, so i don't think i should be too worried. But what did it mean, "Your cross to carry?" I'm thinking i should probably head to that restaurant now. Wait, huh?" Something seemed kinda off with the time. "There's no way that it's been 2 hours! None! Guess I missed our date after all... I better head home."

Did you enjoy the first Chapter? What does our unfortunate protagonist has to look forward to... Find out what that test tube actually did in the next chapter.


	2. Living Pictures

"Hi. This is Lorelei. I'm not at the phone right now. If you're my ex-boyfriend, calling to explain why you stood me up, hang up. Anyone else, please leave a message after the beep." Damnit. Because of that detour, he'd lost his girlfriend. He pulled up a picture on his phone, looking wistfully at it. Then he stiffened. Had it just been his imagination, or had she moved since the last time? "Hello? Who are you? I know you're there, on the other side of this glass!" He exited out, frantically looking around for the source of the voice. But no voice came. Frowning, he decided he might as well sleep.

Lance headed back home, and suddenly heard some really loud noises coming from his bedroom. It sounded like gunfire! Thanking his lucky stars that his mother wasn't home, he ran upstairs, yelling "What the heck's going on in there?!" The noises suddenly stopped. Lance opened the door, bracing himself for whatever was in there. He found... nothing. Absolutely nothing. He stood there, puzzled. The place looked perfectly normal and clean and-

"OW!" Something had just hit him in the back of the head. He picked it up. It looked kind of familiar, but he couldn't quite figure out why. Which was odd, because he knew he'd never seen one before. "I wonder where-OW!" He took another one to the back of the head. "What... where did this-"

"Let me guess how you were going to finish that sentence. Come from? From over here, you dimwit." said a female voice from behind him. He whirled around.

"OK... now I KNOW I've gone crazy." Lance said. He was an adamant Touhou Project fan. He had a collectible Reimu poster on his wall... which was currently waving at him.

"Well, it's about time you noticed! I've been waving at you for the past 15 minutes! Seriously, if you took much longer, I wasn't going to throw any more amulets, I was going to use Fantasy Seal! " Reimu stated, a look of irritation on her face.

What. The. Heck. Just... What. Yesterday, she'd been an inanimate poster. Now, she was moving, talking, and worst of all, physically affecting the world he was in. He had no idea what caused it. It's not like anything strange-

"Oh, that son of a WITCH!" Lance shouted, remembering the incident in the alley. It had to have been that serum. No other reason existed that he could think of. "Marisa doesn't have a son." Reimu replied, being completely clueless as to why that comment had been said.

"Someone talking about me?" came a voice from the computer. Two hands came from the background, grabbed the browser window and shoved it aside. "Hey. So, you the one who changed the universe, ze?" His background picture of Marisa Kirisame was now talking to him. It was official, something had snapped.

"Marisa, if you hadn't noticed, he has NO clue what he's done. ZERO. Don't spring information on him without proper explanation."

"Sure, because you have a GREAT track record with explaining things. Seriously. You didn't even bother to explain halfway decently that you were trying to stop the ones who created the fake moon!"

"The Imperishable Night incident was a long time ago, Marisa! Can i explain stuff to him in peace?"

"No, because you can't explain anything PERIOD!"

"Oh, that's it. Round 2!"

"Fine by me, ze."

Lance realized what was going to happen just in time and dove out of the way as his poster and his computer both started spewing danmaku into the room. They hit one another, a lot. Then they stopped.

"You know, this loses its novelty when you really can't dodge too much." Reimu said wistfully.

"Yeah, I guess it does, ze." Marisa said.

"Can I explain this to him now?"

"Go ahead. I'll be behind the window if you need me." Marisa pulled the browser window back into place.

"You might want some popcorn. And some tea. It's going to be a long story..."

This concludes Chapter 2. Those of you who are more discerning and understand the basic premise behind the story probably think they already figured out what the serum does. But I'll say this... you're probably wrong. The serum's effects will be revealed in the next chapter.


	3. Serum's Full Effects

*Insert CG Cinematics here.*  
"The universe is a much bigger place than many know. Your world is merely one of many. Those worlds you call movies and games, they are all their own worlds, of which a divine barrier called the 4th wall keeps, say, chrono or space-time magic from crossing. You created copies of those lands, upon which the magic of the 4th wall acted, ensuring these copies would only perform that one story. These copies were slaves to their own stories. The time would loop, and the memory of all would be erased. Thus the 4th wall was kept intact and the fact that they really existed was kept shrouded. Some worlds tinkered with a in-house copy of the 4th wall, which, unlike the original, was created with a special loophole that allowed it to break, under the right circumstances. Fanfiction created an identical copy of the world... So there's a lot of copies of Gensokyo. How many? Even Yukari doesn't know..."

"But that is besides the point. Even still pictures, as I am clearly demonstrating, are themselves a copy of a world, just frozen in time. But something happened today. Something to shake the foundation of the universe and destabilize the 4th wall itself. What is that something? That something is YOU, Lance!"

"What? I didn't ask for this, you know! It force-fed me that serum!" Lance sputtered, outraged that she's blaming this on him.

"What serum are you referring to?" Reimu queried, puzzled.

Lance then went into a full account, starting with his date, and ending with hearing gunfire from this room. "Speaking of which, what was that?" Lance asked. "Oh, nothing. Me and Marisa were just going for a few rounds." Reimu replied. "Anyway, I think I know someone who can help analyze this... serum. So I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere. Maybe try talking to Marisa." Reimu then walked off into the background.

"So, Marisa, read any good books lately?" Lance asked awkwardly. "Yeah, and I doubt Patchy's happy about it." Marisa replied cheerfully. Oh, yeah, he forgot she was a kleptomaniac.

"You two enjoying your chat?" Reimu sounded grouchy again. "Meet-" "Eirin Yagokoro, medic and part-time mad scientist." Lance cut her off. "Yeah, i know her."

"I'm here to analyze a blood sample." Eirin said bluntly. "And i don't appreciate the 'mad scientist' comment."

"Blood sample?" Lance asked. "Look, do we have to do a blood sample?"

"The serum's already in your bloodstream, so a blood sample would be the best way to analyze the effects." Reimu replied.

"We can do this the easy way..." Eirin said, pulling out a needle, tube and vial like those used to draw blood. "Or we could do it the hard way if you don't want to cooperate." She pulled out a deck of bladed cards.

Lance ran. He ran out the door and sat down under a tree, chest heaving. Why him? Why? Why was it that he got cornered by that shadow? Why not someone else? As he sat there, thoughts abuzz, he felt what appeared to be a mosquito bite. He looked over, and he saw a needle, attached to a tube, attached to... "Oh crap..."

"I'll forgive you for that..." Eirin said, looking somewhat annoyed and sitting a few feet away, vial in hand, "...But can I please take that sample now?"


	4. Going Home

Lance was stunned. This day was not going his way, was it? First the ambush, then the fact that his life was changed, and now he was being threatened by Eirin Yagokoro! Someone who he knew full well was quite capable of inflicting a fate worse than death on him. Fate certainly seemed to hate him.

"You're not going to scream? That's good. Last thing anyone needs is unwanted attention. Especially yourself." Eirin remarked, very easily keeping the pressure on him. "I'll investigate this sample. In the meantime, try to stay away from anything with a fourth wall for a bit."

"Easier said than done." he replied bitterly. "Because in this world, fourth walls are everywhere! Pictures, advertisements, movies, games! The only way to NOT be near one is to check in to a padded cell."

"I thought you might say that." Eirin replied calmly. "I have an alternative, but you're probably not going to like it."

"What's the alternative?" Lance asked, not sure where this was going. "And why do you suddenly look a lot... scarier?"

Suddenly, he found himself completely unable to move as Eirin expertly grabbed him and started dragging him back towards the house. "You said it yourself, being in this world is too risky right now. So stop struggling, I'm not going to hurt you."

Lance wanted to argue, but at the same time, Eirin always had a bunch of tricks up her sleeve. He did not want to become one of her test subjects, that much he knew. Nor did he want to be hit with a spellcard, so the safest thing to do was probably to not resist.

"*chuckle* The princess will certainly be happy. We haven't had a visitor in a long time. Unless you count that pheonix." Eirin was saying. "I'm sure you two will get along splendidly. You have so much in common!"

Oh... shoot. Did he hear that right? Because if he did, Eirin was taking him back to Eintei with her! He didn't seem to have much of a choice, but he wasn't going to where Eirin kept her lab without a fight. He tried to break her grip, but it was like iron. She didn't even seem to notice, but just kept right on going. They had reached the front door at this point!

"I'm not going to Eintei with her!" Lance said to himself. "Hang the consequences, it's NOT happening!" He concentrated on those feelings, and almost seemed to have a mental fist, which he swung in Eirin's direction.

"OW! Oh, you just asked for pain, Lance. Now prepare to get it." Eirin said, her cheerful demeanor disappearing. "I don't know how you did that, but I WILL get you to Eintei. Whether you get there in relatively fine condition or extremely bruised and battered depends on my mood. So don't push me!" She then slashed his arm with one of her bladed cards. Not deep enough to bleed, but still enough to cause pain. "Consider that a warning. Now give up this useless resistance."

_That was danmaku!_ Eirin thought to herself. _That serum must have more effects than we originally thought. Now it's even more imperative that I get back to Eintei quickly and analyze it._

Lance was in a great deal of pain from the sudden attack. It was pretty clear that he was VERY much outmatched. He was amazed Eirin hadn't just knocked him out yet. He offered no further resistance as Eirin dragged him back to his room.

"Eirin, what are you doing?" Reimu asked.

"Change of plans, Reimu. He's coming back to Eintei with me." Eirin said, not wavering an inch.

"That wasn't I originally-"

"Your intentions, in this case, do not matter. In his current state, he would be a menace to this world regardless of where he goes. In Eintei, we can try to teach him how to control and harness his powers." Eirin explained. "Unless you see it differently?"

"I have to admit, that reasoning is flawless." Reimu conceded.

"Let me through, Reimu." Eirin said, her voice taking on a threatening tone, noticing that Reimu was blocking the entire door.

"Oh, sorry. I'll move." Reimu said.

Eirin dragged Lance towards the poster, and Lance closed his eyes, hoping that maybe he wouldn't be able to go through. Maybe he'd just bang his head. Maybe-

"Ah, Gensokyo again. They say there's no place like home, so why don't we head there?" Eirin jovially exclaimed. "After all, it'll be your home too, for a while. Until we know more about the serum, you can consider yourself a guest there! Now, let's go!"

End of Chapter 4! Be honest, you probably saw this coming.


	5. Serum's Second Effect

Chapter 5: The Serum's Second Effect

Lance could see pretty clearly the immediate future. Eirin was going to drag him to Eintei, and then? Well, from the looks of things, he'd meet the infamous Princess Kaguya. What happened after that would depend on what that serum had done to him.

"Ah, and here we have the Scarlet Devil Mansion. Home to Remilia Scarlet, the descendant of Vlad Tepes. Even though she is supposedly his descendant, she knows absolutely nothing of the Belmonts. We tried mentioning them once and she didn't even blink. Do take care not to anger her. Take even better care to keep a distance of about a mile between you and the mansion in the first place!"

Eirin was unusually cheerful, a lot more than Lance had expected. He suspected something was up, but he had no idea what. For whatever reason, Eirin had insisted that before they went to Eintei, she would take him on a tour of Gensokyo. He had complied because he did not want those blades near him again anytime in the near future.

"And over here we have the Misty Lake, home to everyone's favorite adorable prankster who always gets in over her head because she's a nine." Eirin continued narrating.

"Eye'm not a nine! Eye'm the strongest!" came a voice.

"You have impeccable timing, Cirno." said Eirin calmly. "We were just discussing how idiotic you can be, isn't that right, Lance?"

Oh, fiddlesticks. Now he knew why Eirin had dragged him around. Eirin had been trying to force him into a confrontation to see how he would react. He tried to talk his way out of it.

"It's not like that, I-"

"Nobody insults the strongest and gets away with it! I'll deal with you later, person with the red cross. As for you, human with the funny clothes, I'll take you down!"

Cirno began firing at him. He decided to reflect on what he did to get into this situation. As he reflected, he closed his eyes, waiting for the pain.

Then, his eyes snapped open. Devoid of fear, worry, or emotion in general. He rose into the air and began firing back at Cirno. His bullets were shaped like... actually, he fired off every type of bullet known to Gensokyo at the same time.

Eirin sat down a little ways away. She pulled out a notepad and began to write in it. "13:40 Subject 4S has engaged Cirno. Despite claiming to have no power, is holding own surprisingly well."

"Eye will not lose to you! Eye am the strongest! **Ice Sign: Icicle Fall**!"

Eirin continued to write: "13:50 Cirno has initiated Icicle Fall Variant 2. Subject 4S is still just shooting in what appears to be completely random fashion. It's working, though."

"Agghhh! Just go down already, you nasty human! You're just as annoying as that shrine maiden!"

"14:02 Subject 4S is still displaying no emotion. Even Reimu gloats when she times out a spellcard. Should investigate further."

"Ugh... Eye... am... the... strongest..." *thud*

"14:20 Subject 4S defeated Cirno. Is flying back down."

Eirin walked over to Lance. "Well, champ. How'd you like your first taste of battle?" she asked, hiding a grin.

"Huh? What? Did you stop Cirno from attacking me? If you did, thanks. I-"

"Wait, wait, wait. You don't remember that battle you just had?"

"What battle? I closed my eyes, waiting for pain, and when i opened them, you were over there and Cirno was on the ground."

"Um... never mind. We'll drop it for now. We should get back to Eintei. To the Bamboo Forest!"

_That's strange. He really has no memory of that at all? I need to find out more about why that is._ Eirin thought to herself.

They arrived at the entrance to the forest. "Well, i guess we're walking. Better start moving!" Eirin said rather cheerfully. They walked together into the Bamboo Forest of the Lost.


	6. Lost In The Woods

Ch. 6: Lost in the Woods

"Ah! That was a bright light! Is it always like this, Eirin?" Lance asked.

There was no response.

Lance frantically started looking around. "Eirin? Where are you? Hello?"  
_Hang on a second._ he thought. _Can one really call this a 'forest?' It seems more like a cross pathway with trees bordering it._

It then occurred to him. Things were awfully... samey for Gensokyo. That, and the lack of Eirin or anyone in general meant that he probably wasn't there anymore. So where was he? Last thing he remembered, they'd walked into the Bamboo Forest of the Lost...

Forest.  
Lost.

Woods are another name for a forest.

"Could this day get any worse? I already was dragged to Gensokyo against my will, and now I'm in the LOST WOODS!"

_Calm down. I need to think. How did one get through the Lost Woods again? And how did one obtain the Master Sword?_ he thought.

"Darn it! I don't remember! Looks like I'll need to find out the hard way, then."

He began to backtrack, despondedly walking back towards where he knew the entrance was. Then he banged his head on something.

"OW! The heck?" he was very confused. _It seems some sort of invisible wall is keeping me from leaving. I do hate those._

"Oh, right! I remember now!" Yeah. Wrong Lost Woods. These ones didn't have a Master Sword in them! So, all he had to do was... wait. Who were those strange creatures... Shoot.

"MOBLINS! I better get out of here!"

Bang! "OW! MY HEAD!" He suddenly realized he had a sword on his back. He pulled it out and, yelling fight phrases the whole time, defeated the moblins. Then he headed north. Ran smack-dab into another group. He suddenly had an urge to draw back his arm.

Ponk! _So much for that... looks like they're immune to arrows._

He thrashed them with the sword too and moved west. Where he was set upon by another group he had an urge to swing at with his left hand. A blue flame appeared, but did not harm them. _The Blue Candle? OK..._

Thrashing the Moblins, he headed south, then west again. Whereupon he was greeted by another flash of light. "KYUUH!"

"We're here!" came Eirin's voice. "Eintei!"

Chapter 6 end. Sorry it's so short guys. But this was a side trip that has importance later.

"


	7. Serum's Third Effect & Mental Confusion

Chapter 7: The Serum's Third Effect and Mental Confusion

"Ah, Eintei. Feels like just yesterday that I was here." Eirin reminisced, a dreamy look on her face as she stared at the building. "Sure is funny how time-"

She was interrupted by a nearby rabbit. "Master, do me a favor and skip the 'haven't been here in forever' speech. It feels like just yesterday you were here because it WAS just yesterday you were here! In fact, you'd probably still be here if Reimu hadn't practically dragged you out of your lab."

"I think you're slightly out of line there, Reisen. But I'm in a good mood, so I'll let it go." Eirin replied, giving a smile with the coldness of steel. "Why don't you come meet our guest? Reisen, this is Lance. He's going to be staying here for the next week or so. Lance, this is-"

Lance abruptly interrupted Eirin. "Reisen Udongein Inaba. Also referred to as Udonge. A rabbit with the power to both create illusions and see through them. Looking into her eyes is said to cause insanity. The 5th boss of Imperishable Night, and one of the many characters involved in the Phantasmagoria of Flower View incident. Fanon often depicts her as being Eirin's lab rabbit and servant." Lance said in a monotone. He blinked. "What? Why's everyone looking at me like that?"

_Interesting. This guy appears to be an encyclopedia of information on us. But how exactly is he not aware of this? Should investigate how far his knowledge goes._ Eirin thought to herself.

Lance was confused. "Weren't you going to introduce Reisen to me?"

Eirin quickly composed herself. "That's obviously not necessary. You clearly already know her pretty well. And me, and probably the princess and that pheonix."

"What makes you say that?" Lance asked.

Eirin smacked her forehead. "Reisen, could you kindly go run the security tape from about 2 minutes ago? This guy's memory loss is getting on my nerves, and it's easier to show him."

Eirin continued to ponder some questions internally: _I wonder, is this amnesia self-given? Is there a way to make him consciously use his powers? I've got a week to bring out the power in him, so I need to find these answers out._

As he watched the footage, Lance cried out: "I don't remember this at all! How... what... What's happening to me?!"

A voice floated in from outside. "Amnesia? I might be able to help with that! I find the easiest solution is just to bang someone on the head hard enough."

Eirin scowled. "Tewi. You can go away, and not bug us right now. Keep your pranks and your hammer to yourself. This person is a guest, and is OFF LIMITS. You try anything, and you get to be the lab rabbit in my next experiment. Got it? So leave us alone."

"Geez, Eirin, you're no fun." Tewi complained, before moving off.

"So, why don't we head to my lab?" Eirin said, the smile back on her face.

She led Lance around a corner, they turned left, went down two flights of stairs, went over to the right, went up a different flight of stairs...

Lance gave up trying to remember the route. After all, he doubted it was going to remain the same, plus it seemed like it was this hard to remember on purpose.

"Here we are. My lab. It's not quite Aperture Science, but it should do the trick." Eirin opened the door. A flash of light came from it.

"UGH! Too bright! Eirin! Could you turn that down? Eirin?"

The light dimmed to a manageable level. Lance found himself in a room. Alone. Without Eirin. It seemed familiar. A voice came on, and, recognizing it, he began to shiver.

"HELLO, AND AGAIN, WELCOME TO THE APERTURE SCIENCE ENRICHMENT CENTER TESTING FACILITIES. WE HOPE YOUR BRIEF DETENTION IN THE RELAXATION VAULT HAS BEEN A PLEASANT ONE. PLEASE KEEP IN MIND THAT ALTHOUGH FUN, AND LEARNING ARE THE PRIMARY GOALS OF ALL ENRICHMENT CENTER ACTIVITIES, SERIOUS INJURIES MAY OCCUR."

"GlaDOS. Well. Looks like another mysterious trip has started."

"THE SUPPLEMENTAL FORMS SUBMITTED HAVE GIVEN YOU ACCESS TO THE TEST CHAMBERS LABELED "SECOND LOOP". YOU CLEARLY ARE SMARTER THAN THE AVERAGE TEST SUBJECT, SO HERE'S TO TEST CHAMBERS 20-38! YOU'LL BE GIVEN A PORTAL GUN WITH BLUE/ORANGE TO START. BY THE END, WE'LL SEE HOW YOU SOLVE PUZZLES REQUIRING 4 PAIRS OF LINKED PORTALS!"

"Wait. What? This wasn't in Portal..." A portal gun dropped down next to him. "OK... this is different." As he moved to retrieve it, it sunk into his palms, integrating with his body. Then, there was a bright flash, and when it cleared, he was with Eirin again.

"Lance? Are you OK? You've just been standing there for a while..." Eirin sounded concerned, but he knew better.

"Yeah. Fine. Can we get on with this?" Lance replied.

Eirin smiled, but it was the knife variety again. "Yes. Sit down over there."

Lance obediently sat down. Suddenly, cables popped out of the chair, trussing him to it. "What the?!"

"Listen to me, Lance!" Eirin yelled. "Starting today, I'm going to train you to use your power! Consciously! You have so much of it, and you're letting it go to waste! This serum may have separated you from your old life, but it's given you power that many would kill to have! And believe me, if you don't harness it, you'll never be safe. NEVER. You'd be a target for every 8 bit, 16 bit. 32 bit, 64 bit, 128 bit, and WHATEVER villain out there. Do you have ANY idea the line you're walking? Yukari Yakumo wanted to ELIMINATE you to keep the world safe. You NEED to learn to harness your power. Also, remember what i said about this lab not quite being like Aperture? Well... I lied. Down below you is a replica of Aperture. Except customizable, and with many more testing parameters than Aperture. You'll learn your power down there. Also, if you're wondering whether anyone will miss you, the answer is 'No.' Why? One word. It is also a name. In fact, I think I see it on your lips right now, so say it."

Lance grimaced. "Keine."

"Good. Now, it's time to begin training. Adios for now!" Eirin said, pulling a red lever. The chair lowered through an open hatch in the floor, and Lance waited to see what Eirin had in store...

To be continued...

Please leave a review. I love reading feedback. It means someone reads this thing.


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